worth reading, I think.

Sunday I returned from a most enjoyable visit to Minnesota. I had gone up for the week to help my sister and brother-in-law ready their house to be sold. The previous week, my sister casually asked if we would be willing to house their husky, but loveable cat, Boris (aka The Russian Spy Cat), while they transitioned. Mike and I agreed, and from that ill-fated decision, the following events occurred:

Saturday

7 p.m. – Over dinner on the eve of my departure, my sister informs me that Boris often has bouts of kitty IBS in the car. A fact she negated to mention when asking me to be a foster parent. Tears of laughter ensued as she recounted past disaster tales. I temporarily considered leaving him in Mankato thus ensuring a poo-free ride home. Let this be a lesson to you – always go with your first instinct.

11:58 p.m. – I go to sleep, praying for dear life that God will not allow Boris to diarrhea in my car.

Sunday

8:30 a.m. – I inform my sister that I will, indeed, be taking Boris with me. We devise a master plan to place newspaper on the bottom of his cat-kennel in case of the dreaded poo explosion.

9:02 a.m. – I have my car jammed full of Black Friday purchases and Boris in tow and I depart Mankato.

9:45 a.m. – I marvel at how calm and content Boris is in the car and remind myself that Courtney has a tendency to be overly dramatic. I turn the radio up for that sweet sound and ease on down the road.

10:02 a.m. – I enter the freeway at Owatanna and notice some strange noises are coming from Boris. I look to find my prayers have been answered, there is no poo party – instead, Boris has had a vomit explosion that smelled to high heaven. I roll my windows down and enjoy the brisk 38 degree Minnesota air while frantically looking for a suitable gas station, wherein I will be able to clean up Boris’ cage AND get a delicious cup of coffee.

10:27 a.m. – Said gas station presents itself in Kasson, MN. I pull off, only to wait in line for a spot at a pump. Apparently the Kwik Trip in Kasson is a mecca on a Sunday morn. I take Boris out of the car, still in his cage and carefully open the door to the cage. He has sat in the puke a little bit, and I carefully place him on the floor of my front seat so as not to get vomit on my white fleece. I go to shut the door when…

10:28 a.m. – Boris SPRINTS from the floor of the car and streaks across the gas station. He is no spry kitten and to see his 20 + pounds moving like a gazelle in the Serengeti is a site to behold. However, instead of enjoying the majesty, my flight reflex kicks in and I run, screaming and flailing my arms across the gas station after Boris, leaving my car door wide open with no regard for my purse and many Black Friday purchases.

10:29 a.m. – Boris rounds the corner of the gas station out of site. I run after him screaming, “Boris, BORIS!” Many gas station patrons inquire if he is my cat and join me in the hunt. I round the corner to find a number of cars, a view of a marsh and the dreaded overpass, but no Boris.

10:30-10:32 a.m. – I wildly look for Boris, screaming his name, heading into the grass, looking under cars. A feeling of dread seeps in that I have lost my sister’s cat and the tears well up in my eyes.

10:33 a.m. – I spot Boris under a car and my heart falls out of my throat, back into my chest. I get down on my hands and knees and try to coax him from underneath the car. He is meowing loudly in a tom-cat sort of way, and will not budge.

10:35 a.m. – He finally peaks his head out of the car and I quickly snatch him up. I then carry him back to car as he – Pinky the Cat style – tries to escape.

10:37 a.m. – I return to my car, where one of the helpful gas station patrons is waiting, holding Boris’ kennel for me. I regretfully inform him that I cannot put Boris back in his cage because it is filled with vomit. He drops the cage like it was made of liquid hot magma.

10:38 a.m. – I ask the fellow if he wouldn’t mind shutting the door for me quickly as I put Boris on the floor of my backseat. He wouldn’t mind – and we successfully trap Boris.

10:42 – 10:38 a.m. – I cleaned up the cage with haste and patted myself on the back for the brilliant newspaper idea. I then very carefully opened my door and held on to Boris. He clung to the floor mat and my atlas with the Jaws of Life. Boris and I are in a full on struggle, I am nearly falling over with laughter at the ridiculousness of the situation and Boris’ super-kitty strength. I finally pry him from the floor, only to reengage the pinky the cat situation while trying to wrestle him into the cage. Tears stream from my eyes and meows bellow from Boris’ lips as we fight the age old battle of good v spy kitty.

10:39 a.m. – Another helpful patron holds the kennel for me and finally, Boris is safe and puke-free. I profusely thank the lady and go in to buy the most wonderful cup of coffee in the world.

3:48 a.m. – We arrive home with no further incident. Boris greets his new brother, Sven, and gets acclimated to his new (temporary) home. I collapse on my coach and silently plot to give Sven some Colon-Blow the first time we visit the Millard’s new residence. (insert evil plan laugh here).

The End.

...

Musings on a Friday morning:

• I am dangerously low on coffee right now - good thing I have nothing to do at work and will have nothing to do for the remainder of the day.
• One of my very favorite songs is playing right now - What's been going on by Amos Lee. I have it at a decently high decibel, so I just closed the door to the cave.
• I am so SO sick of Twilight. I do not read the books, I have not seen the movies and I do not think Robert Pattinson is attractive. Is this craze over yet? This is worse than when a new Harry Potter movie comes out.
• Mike and I are having an extended test drive of the Cube today. I am hoping it convinces him that this is, indeed, the car for us and I won't have to test drive a bunch of grandma cars to appease him. He actually said the word 'Buick' to me and meant it!
• I am headed up to Minn this Sunday and will spend the week helping my sister and brother-in-law get their house ready to be sold. I'm excited to spend some time in the motherland, though Rock said she had to scrape her windshield today, and I am not so excited for that. Turns out I've acclimated to the slightly warmer temperatures IL has to offer and have subsequently turned into a pansy.
  
• We had a "Friendship Thanksgiving" hosted by Jon and Janet this week and it was fantastic! I can't wait for Jon to prepare many more turkeys, because as he put it, "turkeys are dirt cheap."
  
• If you do not already, you should be watching MadMen. It is fantastic. I have watched it out of sequential order and I still enjoy it. It is amazing (for better and for worse) how far we've come in the last 50 years. I suppose 50 years is a significant amount of time, and yet, seems not so long ago considering the way women were treated. Joan, the head secretary, said this when training one of the new secretaries, "And here is your typewriter. The men who designed it made it so easy, even a woman can use it." Sitting in my own office, typing this on my own computer, it is not lost on me the sacrifices and accomplishments of generations of women.
  

and now that all the men reading this have rolled their eyes a couple times, I will end my thoughts and bid you all a Happy Thanksgiving.

cheers!

keep the change, you filthy animal

Tonight, I had to fire my first student worker. In my tenure at AU, 37 work days, this student had 9 last minute absences including 3 no shows/no notice. Keep in mind, this student only works 3 days a week, so in my tenure here, he amassed 23 total possible work days, giving him an absence percentage of 39%.

One would wonder why I waited this long to fire him. I wonder this myself, but stating the obvious, I'm a softie and I fall for the sob story...until today. Last night after he called and left me a message for his 8th absence, I called him back (and of course he didn't answer) and left him a message asking him to come into my office today so we could talk (read: so I could fire him). The kid did not show up TO BE FIRED. So I thought, well, I'll wait until he comes into work tonight at 6 and then fire him...but HE DID NOT SHOW UP. So I was forced to fire him over the phone/view facebook message (because the e-mail address he gave me is unreliable - see, I fall for the sob story).

I was nervous about firing this kid all day, but now that it's done, I feel totally unsatisfied that I didn't get to fire him to his face.

Damn kids.

Letter I wish would be read...

Dear Dannon,

Please reconsider making your "Seasonal Delights" yogurts a limited time offering. The watermelon and cantaloupe flavors are too delicious to only be offered in the summertime. Perhaps you could consider renaming them to "Delightful in all Seasons" and thus, they could be on your permanent flavor list. Just something to think about and then implement.

Sincerely,
Chelsey "yogurt lover" Headrick

Dear Minnesota Twins,

You are and will always be my favorite baseball team. I don't mind that much that you haven't won a World Series since 91 - but man, remember how fantastic that was? Perhaps you could put it on your list to win the World Series next year. Think about it, it would be a great way to christen Target Field AND your fans would be super excited. Win - Win. Also, if you could ask Joe Mauer to call me, that would be great.

"And we'll see you tomorrow night,"
Chelsey "I heart Joe" Headrick

p.s. Did any of you cry after your last game in the Metrodome? Yeah, me neither.

Dear Mike,

Can we please get a Mini Cooper? I will never ask for anything again. The Sola is bumming me out. I'm sure Jason will buy it from us, he likes to have a collection of cars. Don't you want to make your wife happy? Think about it.

love you,
Chels

and that's the way the cookie crumbles...

Hi All,

Thank you for all your well wishes. However, it was recently brought to my attention that I have no chance of winning even if I attain the letter 'B.' Apparently, the fine print stipulates that you must keep the letters in order to be eligible to win. I, foolishly, simply entered my codes on the computer and threw my pieces away. Thus, no car for me.

10, I'm glad we both share a love of the office and I would still encourage you to eat at subway as it is delish.

Happy Friday, everyone!

Today's Post is brought to you by the letter B

Hello all. In case you haven't checked my facebook status lately, or you are not facebook friends with me, I will tell you of my quest. Subway is currently featuring "Scrabble" wherein you collect letters and try to spell things to win great prizes. I am one small letter B away from wining a 2009 Toyota Prius!!! (Full Disclosure, I'm sure they made like 2 letter B's and they have already been tossed by some guys who work construction in Idaho, but I hold out hope.) I'm thinking that the more I send out positive vibes to the Universe (read: facebook, blog, and casual conversation), the better shot I have of receiving a new car via the letter B. Maybe if I just use B words all day that will help too...In closing, if you happen to glean the letter B off your subway cup in the next couple weeks, would you pass the code my way? Thanks.

Bears, Beets, Battlestar Galactica.

Ch-ch-ch-changes

...for the Headricks in 2 big ways:

#1. I have a job. Yep, a real one. Not just one where I deliver wine sometimes and pour wine for drunkards. I am now in my 3rd day working for Aurora University, which some of you may remember as the college that gave me a degree. I am a "Communications Specialist" and am slowly figuring out what that means. So far, I haven't done much but meet with people I'll be working with. Tonight I meet my student workers, so hold on for what is sure to be some Freshman drama tales. In summation: "woo hoo."

#2. Mike is an Ironman! Last weekend he completed his plight and it was in a word, fantastic. His folks, my family, Rock and Jonas, Karkar and her sister Jilly all came in from the west and H, Janet, Maddie, Jamie and Jay all came up from the Chicagoland area. We had a quite a crew which worked out nicely. We were able to spread the course and give Mike lots of support. It was a little overwhelming for me at certain points what with the wrangling of the Iron Mike Fan Club and the ever present nerves I felt. I was much more nervous for Mike then he was for himself. Anytime I saw an ambulance or saw a biker eat it hard, my stomach always dropped.

He came through with flying colors, completing the 2.4 mile swim, 112 mile bike and 26.2 mile run in 14 hours 34 min and 43 seconds. At the end, there is a big crowd on each side and the music is pumping and the MC declares, Mike Headrick, Oswego, IL YOU ARE AN IRONMAN and it is very inspiring. I may or may not have teared up a little. Mike chose not to sign up for next year's race and everyday since he has been kicking himself. So for all of you who would like to see him do this crazy race again, which I highly recommend, let me know and I'll give you the info for the 2011 race. Until then, look for us at the Lawrence and Michigan half ironman competitions.

i'm not in kansas anymore...

but i was and it was fantastic! i now present to you an ode, in pictures: just kidding. the image uploader will not work, so i will just talk about my favorite things about kansas.

1. mi familia. delish. plus they give you free glasses that say "never just one margarita" if you put them in your purse.

2. ready, set, go to bed. a fine pillowcase with a fine man sleeping on it.

3. before kansas, I was living in a world of darkness, but jim and kos said, "right, let's get some light in here" and I fell in love with "it's always sunny in philly." ooooOOOOOhhhhooohhhh.

4. tailgating. it was a blasty blast. plus, i fit right in with my jayhawk teeshirt, thanks Al!

5. Finn. This is where the pictures really would have come in handy because this kid is cute. I mean really cute. I'll try again. nope, still broken. blast. you'll have to take my word for it, OR check out Skye's blog.

6. The fine watering holes in the greater Lawrence area. My favorite, the Red Lyon, but only because they had strongbow in the cans. I also enjoyed Louise's west for the fine patio set up. Though, who could forget Willie's (aka Raffy's) that comes complete with jukebox and smelly ladies who don't want their picture taken? next trip: shark attacks.

for more on the fun, check out Jim's blog where there should be a recap coming sometime within the next two weeks. ahhhh just kidding jim. (bergman, if you read this, which i don't think you do, lay off, just jokes.)

and now i must mentally prepare for my big kid's job, which starts next tuesday. i'll miss you, drinking coffee and slacking off...

i suppose i should blog in august...

so i will, briefly.

august has flown. here are some things that have occupied our time.

1. Minnesota

Minnesota was fantastic, as per usual. We spent 9 wonderful days with family, loons and Lake Minnewaska. Highlights: Mike (painfully) learned to slolam ski. Lucia loved (finally) spending time with her aunt and uncle. Jonas (Rock's new flame) came for a Rambow family meet and greet and was humerous and fun. We spent time with Mike's family, including his Grandma Ellen who is miraculously turning 90 despite looking like a spry 71 year old. We attended my Grandma Dee's 80th birthday and spent some quality time with my extended Rambow family. We relaxed on the lake and fantasized about owning a lake home.

2. Softball

The Mill Race Cyclery Softball team was a ragtag bunch who can count drinking beer as their finest accomplishment. It is painful, but always entertaining for this coach's kid to watch these air traffic controllers try to play ball. Thankfully the season is over. Mike only owes 38 dollars in error fees to the final party.

3. Running/Ironman countdown

I have improved my running once again. I am not quite to the level of fitness I was a few years ago, but I am on my way. Mike is in the final stages of his Ironman training and is getting very excited/nervous. To be fair, I am probably more nervous than he is. As of today, we are 21 days away from Mike becoming an Ironman. Positive thoughts sent into the universe would be much apprieciated!

In closing, listen to this song. It is sure to brighten your day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eoaTl7IcFs8&feature=related

oh and speaking of things to brighten your day:

top ten things i love right now (in no particular order)

The following is a list of things I am really loving right now. I find it's fun to make these kinds of lists as a sort of mini-time capsule of this time in my life. Perhaps you will find it fun too.

I love:

1. The Capuccino Icers at the Village Grind. They are perfect for a hot summer's day and a walk with...
2. Sven. Who wouldn't love this little puppy? He is cuddly and does the funniest little butt scoot when he gets excited (note: this is not the same thing as a dog scooting it's butt across the floor, which is gross, this is more a tucked in butt run and it is grande.)
3. enjoying a ice cold beverage in my UND tumbler on our new patio furniture.
4. the sound of Mike playing Pac Man in the background. I love it when he eats the ghosts. (aside: why was the companion game called Ms. Pac Man? Why not Pac Lady?)
5. Danger Cocktails. Mike and I discovered these during our Wine Tasting tour of Michigan. They are a delicious blend of Michigan Cranberry Wine and Michigan Vodka. When the boys played with their wizzard sticks on the 4th of July, we ladies classed it up with the Danger Cocktails.
6. Burn Notice. Lyle C. has been trying to get me to watch it for 2 years. I have finally listened to him and am happier for it. It is much like the Bourne Identity movies, only with pithy dialogue.
7. Between 2 Ferns. Google it.
8. Minnesota Twins Baseball (this is not new, but still worth noting, I think).
9. Talking to Lucia on the phone. She really loves to sing songs and say hi to Muncle Mikey.
10. The Proposal starring Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock. a. I love both of these actors and b. it was much better than I was anticipating, which is always a welcome surprise. It is a good date movie, but still a rom com, so boys, take a woman as a cover (wink).

we don't need no water.

I love campfires. Maybe it's a Minnesota thing, or a camp thing, or a Rambow thing, but there is something spiritual to me about campfires. Tonight Takashi, Aya and Mia were over after an evening of driving range and Tap House to have a campfire and it was so peaceful and relaxing. I love going to bed with my hair smelling like campfire smoke, is this strange? Be it so or be it not, I don't care because I love it. I will sleep well tonight, to be sure. Kum-by-ya.

p.s.

Dear Katie,

In my next life, I'm going to be organized. I will be punctual and follow through on things I said I would follow through on. If I say that I will deliver your birthday gift to Mandy when I see her in Grand Forks for Nate's wedding, I will actually do it. I will not forget it in my suitcase and find it nearly three months later and then pack it up to mail it. When someone moves, I will make sure to get their new address right away so that I do not have to wait for someone to answer my facebook status in order to send them a package. I am deeply sorry for being such an unreliable gift deliverer.

Your Friend (at least I hope you still consider me your friend),
Chelsey

p.s. I would really like you to move to Oswego and be my neighbor. Just remember how much fun we had over 4th of July weekend. I know you are thinking it had a lot to do with Jim, Alex and Kos being around, but it didn't. It all had to do with how much time we spent together. That could be every day. This has possibly crossed over the creepy line, but I don't care. Especially since you don't even read my blog. If you lived by me, you wouln't have to. I would just walk over to your house and tell you.

p.p.s. I totally get why you want to move to St. Charles.

rock and roll

thoughts and musings:

i hate clover. hate. clover. hate. i spent the better part of 2 hours pulling it and then trying to suffocate it with mulch. fingers crossed i will not have to do this again. ah the perils of being a homeowner.

t-4 days until our visitors from kansas arrive. anticipation and excitement are high.

my car broke down today. i'm not sure what happened, but there is an abundance of fluid on my garage floor where my car was before it moved 2.8 feet and then died, so i'm guessing it has something to do with that. ah the perils of owning an old automobile.

i love wimbolden. it is on my life list to attend. i will wear white and a big hat.

mike turned 28 on Wednesday and we had a bar-b-que wherein we made WAY too much food. Subsequently, Mike and I have been eating leftover hamburgers and hotdogs all week. Nothing sounds less delish to me than a hamburger at this point. The birthday boy enjoyed quite a number of miller lites on wednesday and felt very sleepy. I photographed accordingly:

Happy Birthday, love.

I recently returned from a Minnesota trip which included 2 weddings, 9 puppies, 3 trips to the cabin, a much needed hair coloring, lucia's birthday, a trip to camp, and hanging out with my best bud, rocky. She enjoys to take photos of herself on my camera, so I feel that others should feel the joy of viewing.

you're welcome.

fin.

Why Not? Well...

Last "weekend" (meaning Mike's weekend, meaning Tuesday and Wednesday) Mike and I journed to his homeland. We hadn't been in Minot since Mike's little brother's graduation, so roughly a year. For the most part, I like visiting my in-laws. There is always a ton of delish food, usually prepared on a grill or in a rib smoker (yum) and an endless amount of alcoholic beverages served throughout the day. In fact, I usually refer to an upcoming trip to Minot as a 3 day bender (actual number of days variable to number of days of trip).

In fact, this trip was staring out swimmingly. Mike's extended family drove up from Bismarck on Tuesday night just to join us at the Bar-b-que and Mike's questionable cousin actually shaved off his mullet and didn't stare at my chest, so aces. We were having a great time, chating and drinking and watching Mike's little cousin (Mullet's son) pee his pants twice in front of everyone. Smooth sailing, right up until someone (read: my father-in-law) decides to start talking about politics. Now, perhaps it should be said that my in-laws are turbo I-heart-Rush-and-my-gun Republicans. In the past, I may or may not have gotten into some ill-advised 'discussions' about politics before I understood that discussion and dissention of Headrick opinion are not allowed. So I guess what I am trying to say that everyone knows that I am a turbo bleeding-heart-not-just-voted-for-Barack-but-contributed-to-his-campaign Liberal and subsequently they all kind of don't like me. In the interest of keeping the peace, and let's face it at my husband's insistance, I have taken the policy of keeping my mouth shut during political discussions and/or changing the subject and/or flat out leaving the room when I can't take it anymore (this is where that whole 3 day bender thing comes in handy). Suffice to say, this goes against my upbringing and general nature, but really is best for all involved. And let's face it, indirectly being called a "Communist" five or six times is pretty mild compared to what's been said to me in the past, so the weekend was pretty successful on this point as well.

Highlights include: My mother-in-law and I getting pedicures, Erica, Anthony, Brayden and Easton showing up, the gravy at Speedway and this little gem, a fine version of the National Anthem/O Canada:



Lowlights include: aforementioned political bashing, the kid who wouldn't stop screaming the entire flight from Minot to Mpls, and the possiblity of either mike or I throwing up on the flight from Mpls to Minot. I won't say who did or did not throw up, but it was me.

In conclusion, I am just over-joyed thinking about our 7 day Bender in November. Lord knows I'll need the booze. Anyone want to come join the fun? Tara, get ready.

run, run rudolph

So I've taken up running again. Not because I like it, but because I have to do it to retain any suitable level of fitness. I have mixed feelings about the running. When I get good at it, and let's be honest, I'm using the term "good" pretty fast and loose here, I almost like it. I get a kind of euphoria when I'm done and a great feeling of accomplishment when, say, I've finished running 13.1 miles without passing out. When I am bad at it, as I am now, I hate running with the fire of a thousand suns. The irony of Mike's incredible level of running fitness comparatively to my uber poor level of running fitness is not lost on me. At one point Mike could not run a full mile without stopping to walk while I was buzzing by him with gusto. Therein lies the most frustrating thing about running, if you don't continue to run, it's like you never did.

That being said, last night, after a grocery trip to Target, Mike decided we needed to go to out on a run before it got too dark. I decided we needed to eat dinner first, both to quench my hunger and as a secret ploy to not have to run. After some tasty turkey sandwiches and some crispy raw veggies, we were off. 3 min into the run it started to rain, but only slightly. The further we got from home, the harder it started raining until it went from a drizzle to a pour. Mike, who it should be said is a little off mentally since he started his training, is loving the rain, talking about if he could ever run a hundred miles in one day and having a great time. I on the other hand, am barely breathing, burping up broccoli and fighting nausea. We finally make it home and I am mostly soaking wet, which is to say that because of "the shelf" only the top of Barack's head is wet, and completely exhausted. I am feeling a small amount of personal accomplishment, but no euphoria. But on a positive note, a hot shower has never felt so good.

Stupid Mike

Future Jim

I forgot to mention that at Mike's half marathon I saw future Jim. If in fact future Jim takes up bicyling and enjoys the touch of spandex to his skin.


You're welcome.

The Plight of an Iron Man

As many of you know, Mike is training for the uber-insane Iron Man triathlon. He has subsequently signed up for many smaller races as part of his training. The last week was bookended by two substantial races. The first was accompanied by a super fast trip to Mo-town for the 25th Annual (2nd Tri) Tinman Triathlon. Some may remember this as the same tri Mike and I trained for last year which got snowed out. We departed on Friday at 1:23 P.M. and arrived in Morris a short 8 hours and 15 minutes later. Mike woke up early and headed for the pool. My family all showed up for the festivities. Here's the breakdown of the race: 1100 yard swim, 19 mile bike, 6.2 mile run. Mike finished the swim in 18 min. Here he is biking: 1 hour 10 min.

Here he is at the finish. Took him 53 min to run the 10k, nothing to sneeze at if you ask me.
I don't have any photos of the swim. Someone forgot to bring her camera to that part. In total it took him 2 hours and 23 min. Way to go Mikey!

Last Sunday Mike ran his first half marathon. He has been living in my shadow for the past year and a half and had to do one of his own. I may or may not have been taunting him that I have run farther than him. I consider taunting to be one of the pillars of a good marriage. Needless to say I reminded him that if he didn't beat my time of 2 hours 12 min. he would never hear the end of it. Here he is at the start of his half.

This race took place in a city park that was an old farmstead and had these really sweet barns. I have a somewhat unhealthy obsession with photographing barns, but I won't bore you with all of my barn photos, just this one with a runner in it. He ended up finishing in 1 hour 56 min. which of course, obliterated my time. See, taunting works :)

In conclusion, I haven't done anything blog worthy in the past week, unless you count pouring wine at a festival blog worthy. Therefore, I live vicariously through my husband. His Iron Man plight is indeed inspiring. I hope many of you can make it to cheer him on September 13th in Madison, WI for Iron Man Moo!

Trainwreck Sue

So one day Mike comes home and mentions that we are invited to a going away party for one of his fellow controllers. Naturally, I am excited at the opportunity to get out of my house and immediately agree to attend. He then told me it is at a French cooking school downtown Chicago. Now, agree or disagree, that's a strange place to have a going away party, but I was intrigued and we decided to attend.

We made arrangements to ride the train downtown with another couple and a psuedo couple who both single and work at the center. Mike and Ryan (single psuedo couple member) decide to get a couple giant soporos for the ride down. Other member of the psuedo couple, "Trainwreck Sue" (real name protected for obvious reasons to follow), also brings a mixed drink on the train.

Here's some background on Trainwreck Sue. I have only hung out with her a handful of times, but everytime I see her she is a. fall-down-drunk and b. with a different guy. That is until she had a baby. Now every time I see her she is just fall-down-drunk. She had a DUI and therefore always tries to pawn rides off people. She is very loud, very argumentative and very annoying. Needless to say I was jazzed that she was along for this evening. Ok back to the train.

So Trainwreck Sue proceeds to get drunk in about 30 seconds. She is screaming a story at us the whole train ride downtown. She is also very upset with Mike, Ryan and I for not coming to pick her up. It should be stated that she didn't call for a ride until 20 minutes before we left the house, and we don't live next door if you get my meaning.

Two very headache inducing train rides later, we arrive in the French Food School neighborhood, about 45 min. early. Natch, we head to a bar to tie one on before cooking time. At this point, Trainwreck Sue, who is also from MN, decides to have a discussion with me on why the Timberwolves suck so much. And by "discussion" I mean lecture and by "with me" I mean I was present being yelled at.

Fast forward to the cooking class. We meet up with the rest of the couples and start cooking. People are having fun, catching up, paying attention learning to cook and taking some pictures. Trainwreck Sue thinks it would be a great idea to hold up some rather large butcher knives to people's throats for some awesome pictures. Of course the people with knives being held to their throats by a drunken crazy are less enthused.

Despite her loud and intrusive outbursts, the rest of the cooking goes fairly smoothly, that is until one of the sous chefs clanks on a pan and alerts the entire group (who included about 10 random strangers) that she caught someone smoking in the stairwell and there is absolutely no smoking in the Frenchy Food School. Did I mention Trainwreck Sue likes to smoke?

So we sit down to eat and the Brie tort with leeks and bacon is to die. I could have done with out the salmon stuffed pastry dish but that is neither here nor there. Someone starts talking about a previous dinner party that took place about 2.7 years earlier right after Mike and I were married. Trainwreck Sue looks at me and starts yelling, "I remember that you were SO pretty and SO thin THEN." Over and over. Awesome.

So it's time to go home and everyone who has separte transportation gives us the "good luck" face. We decide to take a cab to our second train rather than wait out in the cold for the first train. The cabbie has to pull over twice because Trainwreck decides to light up in the cab after repeated warnings from everyone in the cab. We get to our train home and approximately 10 min in T. Sue is transported to another car because she is yelling at a boy across the train that she will "fucking choke him" because he was smiling and laughing. The "train police" tells us that if she comes back to sit with us she will get kicked off the train. If we try to sit with her, we will get kicked off the train. No problem there, we tell ol'train cop. The entire car watches and reacts as she falls flat on her face exiting the car to her "jail car."

10 min. later she's back in our car and we are all pleading with her to go back to where she was. She sits on the lower level and starts chatting it up with some creepy stranger who, against all odds, is trying to get in her pants. Miraculously, she does not exit the train with him and we make it back to our stop.

You may think, man crazy night, glad it's over, but you'd be wrong. We are saying our goodbyes and Sue starts stumbling to her car. She is so drunk at this point she can barely keep her eyes open. We convince her to ride home with us and come pick her car up with the morning. The whole car ride she is prattling on about how no one would come pick her up and what horrible people we are blah blah. Then, halfway to her house she says, "Oh, we've got to go pick up my son." REALLY? I protested because I obviously don't have a car seat in my car, she she says, "It's no problem, when I take a cab I just hold him in the back seat." Awesome.

Turns out it is only two blocks from the sitters to her house. We get to her house and I am amazed that she can even walk while holding her baby. I am panged with terrible guilt for even leaving her alone with her kid at this point, but what do you do? She is so pissed at us for not picking her up she is screaming at us and then just stumbles into her house. Sweet, see you again never.

Until...I get a message the next morning that she left her purse in my car with her keys and phone in it. Reading between the lines, I figure out that I am supposed to bring it back to her. Not wanting to risk another back seat baby ride, I convince my friend, Jon, to come with me to drive her car to her house. When we arrive she's all smiles. No recollection on what a huge douche she was the night before. I say a quick "you're welcome" and get the hell out of there. On the way home, Jon looks at me and says, "You Nordic people are weird."

Annnnd Scene.

a ha ha

Thoughts of the day:

1. I miss Minnesota. This past weekend was spent in Minneapola-ha-ha with some dear old friends and my family. We had drinks, laughs, sang songs and watched the Minnesota high school dance and it was fantastic. On the non-fantastic side, my Grandma Doris had a health scare in the form of a blood clot near her heart. They have since dissolved the clot, but the doctor said if she wouldn't have gone into the hospital, she would have died. Needless to say, that was not fun to hear and caused us all to have a little aneurysm ourselves. This whole episode reminded me all the more of how hard it is to live far away, yet made me very grateful that I was around my family when it happened.

2. In less depressing news: I got a new account today! This was by far my easiest sale yet. The wine guy, Paul, contacted me. I brought him in a shiz ton of wine which he did not even taste. Then he purchased five cases. ACES!

3. I love sloppy joes. Mike made them last night out of a recipe from the Better Homes and Gardens cookbook (aka Mike's cooking bible) and they were indeed tasty. Bet you wish you had a husband like mine, eh?

4. Sven is learning to be better behaved. Happiness ensues! Mike insisted that we needed to get him a choke chain to help him learn to heel. I was against this, having lost a dog in a choke chain related incident as a child, but inevitably relented. Now mark your calenders, but Mike was right and I was wrong. He is learning and rarely chokes himself, so bravo, Mikey!

5. My bracket for the NCAA tournament is effectively fucked. I thought Gonzaga could do it. Mostly because I like to say their name. Amazing logic defeats me again :)

aaaaaaaaaand that's all she wrote. Happy, Jim?
cheers!

Birthday Achoo's

I am still sick. I was sick on my birthday and sick all weekend and I am over it. Sven loved it because he was able to sleep by my side for days on end. Three highlights:

1. Ms. Sara Zidon was in town and the sisters and Jason and I had dinner on Thursday night. I love baked potatos. Alex, how jealous are you right now? Two Zidons in one weekend.

2. UNO SPIN!

3. With Heather's help, I found some tall black boots (f*&$ing boots, if you will) that actually fit over my cows.

now I will continue to work on being cured so that I can write a more interesting post.

xoxo c.

the freakin weekend

Here's what happened over the weekend:

Friday:

Katie, Jason and I went to buy "supplies" (read: liquor and beers) for the big joint birthday party on Saturday. A mass amount was purchased and we were exhausted from all our exuberant frolicking and decided to decompress with dinner at my new favorite restaurant: Quigley (Down Under) Irish pub. It was everything you want in a restaurant: good atmosphere, great food, cider on tap and waitresses dressed in plaid skirts (I like my wait staff suited up). I will return to this eatery soon, perhaps on Thursday...

Saturday:

The day of the big party. I cleaned for the majority of the day and was quite pleased with my progress. I decided not to super wash my floors because of the heavy foot traffic, and as it turned out, great decision. The tonic waters loved to explode when opened and there was more than one spilled drink. Highlights as remembered include: the return of Jason's awesome Pico as well as a smorgasbord of frozen foods and strawberry shortcake, a late night oldies sing and dance off, watching in amazement as Jason polished off a bottle of Tanqueray largely on his own accord, Katie and my utter failure in our attempt to recreate the Blue Moose's legendary spinach dip -- we blame faulty instruction, and the first time in who knows how long that I stayed up til 4 a.m. A good time was had indeed.

Sunday:

Couch day 10,000. So sleepy. Subway, cleaning, cuddling with Sven, who also made it to 4 a.m. Saturday night. Grammy's. Bed. Boring.

And now for the Birthday Girls!

I am going to try to blog again...problem being, I don't have much to say. However, I am going to challenge myself to blog 3 times a week from now on and see how long it takes for anyone to recognize that I have started up again. First person to comment gets a prize!

So things I have been thinking today:

1.I wish I were a better housekeeper. I did a lot of dusting today and thought, WOW, I should really do this on a regular basis so the dust doesn't come off looking like Little Debbie swirl cakes.

2. Why can't Sven use the toilet? It's cold outside and he is very particular in finding a place to relieve himself.

3. I love Portillos hamburgers and I want one RIGHT NOW. But, I am on an "eat more fruits and veggies and less red meat and bad for you things" diet, so I will resist with all of my will power and will strength.

4. I am not a very good sales person. Too bad 99% of jobs (including mine) are sales related.

5. I wish Cash Cab would come to Chicago and on a day where I ventured downtown and got into a taxi. I love Ben Bailey and quiz shows.

I think that's good for today.

cheers!