Today marks the first day of "lose weight - 2010 edition." Mike and I are on a plan (that he made and is enforcing) to lose 5 pounds a month for the next 6 months while concurrently training for a half marathon. He made me weight myself in front of him and then proceeded to write said weight down in a chart and hang it on the fridge. As you can tell, I'm super jazzed about it. I am hoping that writing this lofty goal aka saying it out loud, will make it come true.
So, cut to 8:47 a.m. and I'm sweating it out on the treadmill. Enter giant blond lady wearing an equally giant white sweatsuit. She starts her walk and as she goes faster, her "I just smoked a whole pack of cigarettes" smell hits me smack in the face with brute force. I had to fight the urge to vomit all over her giant white sweatsuit. There is no worse smell when trying to excersize than smoke. I would rather she be ripping ass the whole time.
Now, don't get me wrong, I fully support anyone's right to smoke. But the smokers I know somehow manage not to smell terrible. Isn't there a conscious effort amongst smokers to freshen up before they walk into a packed work out facility and begin to sweat? Don't you like, keep a bottle of Febreeze in your car or something for emergencies such as these? Help me out, Marlboro lovers - what are the secrets to not smelling like smoke so that I might share them with smoky cloud lady at the gym tomorrow (see how I'm pretending I'm going to work out two days in a row? nice, huh.)
7 comments:
Smoker Smell = Barf. You should start running the treadmill at our gym.
Would you like me to make you a weight loss chart in the style of the Olympic Medal Count Challenge? I'll even laminate it, if you'd like.
perhaps i will start running at your gym. what's the monthly charge?
and thanks for the offer, but i'll pass.
This sounds quite the challenge. I did love how you 'pretended' that you were going to the gym the next day. Did you? I'm sure skiing calories burned are still in effect, so don't over do it.
I did not, Alex. My legs are a bit sore today. Maybe tonight or tomorrow - or yoga at home. we'll see. stupid gym.
When I read the part about "write said weight down in a chart and hang it on the fridge" I was picturing the scene in Knocked Up where they say "We don't want to lose weight necessarily, we're not allowed to say that....we just want you to go home, write down what you weigh, subtract like 20.....and then weigh that much."
I could totally picture Mike Ricky Bobby saying that to you.
he is very kristen wiig esque at times, yes.
I tend to carry gum everywhere I go and wash my hands like a bastard after enjoying a sweet sweet cig. Maybe that will help.
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